Against All Odds
by Soul Reaver
Summary: Mac finds a CD Harm burned for her before her big day. The words of its one song are everything Harm has to say...


Against All Odds  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the series JAG. This be my first fic, so be gentle...I'm not that good at writing from a woman's perspective, being a man and all. I'm not entirely sure of the details of the events around Mac's aborted wedding so bear with me. Phil Collins' lyrics don't belong to me either.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
(A/N: This takes place before Mac's abortive wedding to Brumby.)  
  
Gone. Amazing how much loss and sentiment could be summed up in those four letters. Gone without a trace. Even more descriptive and even more depressing. Harmon Rabb had left for his carrier qualifications not even twenty-four hours ago and barely said goodbye.  
  
God knew she was supposed to be happy, but why wasn't she. Her big day was just around the corner, and her best friend wasn't there to witness it. Well gone without a trace wasn't entirely accurate, there was that recorded CD that had turned up in her inbox earlier that day. It had a post it note from Gunny verifying when it arrived, around 0600 that morning, before Harm had hit the road to go to Norfolk. The label on the CD simply read HARM in big bold letters and on it was another post it note that said, "Mac, please play me."  
  
Sarah Mackenzie stepped into her Corvette, started it up, and holding her breath she put it into the CD player. Into the confines of the car the lyrics of Phil Collins could be heard as the rain poured down from the gray overcast sky that seemed to mirror Sarah's mood that day.  
  
"How can I just let you walk away? Just let you leave without a trace. When I stand here taking every breath with you. You're the only one who really knew me at all." Phil's voice began.  
  
"Harm, you pushed me away." Sarah whispered, softly, feeling like her heart had just shrunk by fifty percent.  
  
"How can you just walk away from me? When all I can do is watch you leave. 'Cause we shared the laughter and the pain. And even shared the tears. You're the only one who really knew me at all." Phil continued to croon.  
  
"I should be thinking, about walking down the aisle. The Admiral, I mean AJ, there to give me away..." Sarah said to herself, "But why am I thinking of last night on his porch."  
  
"So take a look at me now. There's just an empty space. There's nothing left here to remind me. Just the memory of your face." Phil continued to sing as Sarah further remembered her heart to heart with Harm. Where for once she had pushed him away when he offered his heart.  
  
"Are you sure that's him you should be marrying?" Harm asked, his voice trailing off, competing with Phil in the background.  
  
All she had at that moment was the memory of a certain cocksure Naval aviator who she had spent some of the best and worst moments of her life with.  
  
"Take a good look at me now. There's just an empty space. And you coming back to me is against all the odds. And that's what I got to take." Phil continued on.  
  
"Harm, why didn't you tell me sooner?" Sarah said, tears contributing to already lousy visibility thanks to this damnable rainstorm.  
  
When Sarah Mackenzie reached her apartment she sat in her car, not turning off the engine or the radio yet wanting to. Phil's voice was replaced by Harm's voice, singing out his grief.  
  
"I wish I could just make you turn around. Turn around and see me cry. There's so much I need to say to you. So many reasons why. You're the only one who really knew me at all." Phil continued.  
  
At about this instant Sarah lost it. Even though she had turned off the engine, she could still here Phil's voice singing the very contents of Harm's heart with conviction and earnest simplicity.  
  
When she finally made it into her apartment she lay on her bed in her rain soaked clothes and cried.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Harmon Rabb finished his pre-flight check on the F-14 Tomcat. He stared out over the ocean, the skies a dark gray black that reflected his bleak mood. He wondered if Mac had gotten the CD, or if she even played it. It spoke everything he wanted to say yet didn't have the guts to say.  
  
'She's probably caught up with her wedding preparations.' Harm thought, his heart dropping through the carrier's decks.  
  
"Are you ready to go sir?" his RIO asked.  
  
"Just a moment." Harm replied, sending his RIO off.  
  
"But to wait for you is all I can do. And that's what I've got to face. Take a good look at me now. 'Cause I'll still be standing there" Harmon Rabb said to himself, on the deck of an aircraft carrier far far away.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Sorry this one's so short. I've got a French exam tomorrow. 


End file.
